June 26, 2014

May The Synod's Force Be With You...

There is one aspect of divorce and annulments I think is overlooked in any discussion, and that is of the innocent spouse who seeks no active part in the destruction of his/her family, but who is: (1) forced to participate in a no fault divorce where there is no defense of the marriage to be had; (2) forced to participate in an annulment tribunal where the defense of a Sacramental Marriage is at best acknowledged, but never truly defended; (3) forced into an acknowledgement that the Sacramental marriage is "irreparably broken", simply by virtue of a civil divorce decree; (4) forced to acknowledge he/she no longer Loves their spouse by the sheer force of the wills arrayed before them, and the requisite renting of a large portion of one's Heart if they succumb to it; (5) forced into "moving on" when all that is desired is a healing and a "moving back"; (6) forced into fragile parent-child relationships through the breaking of established methods and principles concerning children and divorce;  etc, etc....Where is the True Pastoral Care in all this? What most annulments accomplish and petitioners urge is nothing more than forced decisions from a spouse who is loathe to see a marriage destroyed, a Love clinically removed, a family live aborted. Where is the mercy and compassion in that? 

I for one will continue to resist the promoting of annulments as a cure for marital woes and spousal "healing". Spouses are to sanctify each others Souls through patient acceptance of each others faults and frailties, and if necessary with complete resignation for the good of the children, if any. The same Love that Christ showed from the Cross is the same Love that spouses are supposed to have for each other. If any allow themselves to be forced by a divorce or annulment to acknowledge that their Love has died for the one they vowed to honor and Love forever, then maybe they had not the strength and fortitude to accept such a vocation - or the True Love that was required to sustain it.

The Synod will accomplish nothing but the forcing of the innocent to endure the emotional platitudes showered on abandoning spouses, who willingly chose to step outside the box in order to "move on" -  devoid of any responsibility for the marriage they abandoned and now possibly welcomed back with palms and flowers - regardless of the devastation of the first marriage strewn behind them.

Copyright 2014 David Heath - All Rights Reserved

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