A weekend shopping trip to my local Sams Club and Walmart was my first since the onset of the Chinese Virus. As I gazed upon row after row of empty shelves that formerly held toilet paper, eggs, pizzas and hand sanitizer, I was reminded of why I live in such a great country.
There are many unsung heroes in the present health crisis in which we find ourselves intimately involved. Medical professionals, researchers, first responders, and many others on the front line all deserve a round of applause for their untiring efforts to ensure the safety of the citizens of this great country (though I am sure they'd rather have a solid two weeks off about now). However, no one entity deserves a wider round of applause than our very own USDA, a group of true, unsung heroes, who work tirelessly and in broad daylight so all the world takes notice of them.
No, no. Not this USDA, that does its work largely behind the scenes. Then of whom I am talking?
Why... The United Society of Dumb Asses, of course.
You've no doubt seen the members of the USDA first hand at your local stores as:
- they rush to grab that cart in the parking lot from the elderly couple on Social Security who are just doing their monthly shopping;
- you experience their frenzied clubbing of other shoppers to get to the toilet paper aisle to ensure their own personal ass-hygiene remains unaffected (for an upper respiratory malady, no less);
- you cringe as they flash-mob the egg cooler to claw to that last Medium Grade A carton with 3 broken eggs;
- finally, you see (although the terror of it will live with you for decades to come), whilst clutching your loved ones tightly to your chest, the feral, frenzied look of their blood red eyes as they fight each other to get to that last 4 bottles of hand sanitizer.
Copyright 2020 M3 Squared - All Rights Reserved